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The top things a couple needs to know

when selecting an Officiant
- As seen in Newspapers across America -
 

Rev. Christopher M. Tuttle

Pastor – Vows from the Heart Ministries LLC

President – National Association of Wedding Officiants

 

Over the years many changes have taken place that can confuse and even upset couples when it comes to their Officiant and; what services are offered or expected. The following questions should be asked during the Officiant interview process in addition to the standard questions you may have.

 

How many wedding ceremonies do you perform each year?

This is a very important question to ask. It simply translates to…..Experience. There will be Oops and Uh-Oh’s on your wedding day and someone experienced can handle these issues, large or small, without anyone knowing there was an issue at all, in some cases, not even the bride and groom. Ask what they do for YOU that other Officiants don’t! What “Plan B’s” do they have to assure the little mistakes are going to be covered.

 

Can we be part of the ceremony planning?

Although I provide a ceremony handbook that allows my couples to pick and choose ALL the elements of their ceremony, some Officiants won’t allow this or have very simple, pre made scripts.

 

Will you expect to attend the reception?

Some Officiants not only expect you to invite them, they may even ask that their spouse or partner be invited. This is common as they don’t know anyone at your wedding but you and want company at the meal. You need to know this for the reception headcount. In most cases, this is an unexpected additional cost as per head charges can run very high.

 

Do you attend the rehearsal?

Many coordinators handle the rehearsal while some Officiants demand they do it without any interference from the coordinator. Some include this service in their fee and others charge additional. It’s been a very big issue over the year as coordinators feel that this is their position, when it’s really not. You need to find this out early to avoid any issues. It really depends on you and how comfortable you are.

 

What do you wear?

Some Officiants can dress very formal while others dress very casual, some wear Religious robes when your ceremony may be non-religious. Others wear advertising…. Ask! If you're having a themed wedding, ask if they will participate.

 

How much time do you book between weddings to make sure you're on time?

Another sad fact is; many Officiants overbook their day. What will your Officiant do to prevent this? Do they allow extra time between ceremonies in case of traffic issues? What if the ceremony ahead of your starts or runs late? Do you build in extra time? And lastly, have you ever been late and if so, how many times? There are many horror stories of Officiants that have been up to an hour late to a wedding and this should never…EVER…happen. The best thing to do is; call around and talk to on site coordinators and ask if they have worked with the Officiant you are considering and if they have been late.

 

Is this all you do?

Some Officiants are in this industry just for the money and also perform others tasks. Officiants make the cake and design the flowers, D-Jays are also online ordained Officiants; photographers are also caterers; florists are also coordinators; invitation makers are also photographers; etc. How can anyone give you 100% on one of your most important and special day if they are doing two jobs? How will this look to your guests when the Officiant then jumps over and becomes your D-Jay? How serious was your ceremony? This is just another way to get more of YOUR wedding budget in their pockets!

 

Will you be performing my ceremony?

Sadly, many independent wedding celebrants are now in this as a business and run referral companies. They handle the interview with the two of you only to sub-contract with someone else and send them to you on your wedding day (some even spring this on you at the very last minute) and have paid them much less collecting the difference. Again, this is just another way to get more of YOUR wedding budget in their pockets!

 

Do you pay a referral fee to be listed on any preferred vendors lists or give gifts/kickbacks?

The new wave of the wedding business is simple; make as much money as you possibly can! Some venues that supply preferred vendors lists actually charge the vendor a fee to be there (not based on their professionalism) AND some ask for a kickback for each couple they refer. Simple math, if they have to pay to perform your ceremony, you’re paying for it!

 

Hints and Tips:
• During the interview process, make sure the Officiant is listening to you.
• Don’t base your decision on price; the difference can be “a ceremony you’ll never forget” OR “a ceremony you’ll wish no one would remember” The ceremony, just like the wedding dress, is NOT the area to budget shop.
• Make sure the Officiant will present a ceremony that is a reflection of the two of you, not what he or she thinks you are.
• The average fee for ceremony services in San Diego and Temecula Valley is $250 to $800.

Gratuity:
• According to Wedding etiquette; a gratuity is not expected for independent Officiant services. The only time a gratuity is expected is when you are using the services of a Church and its Pastor and then, the gratuity is a gift to the Church as this is how the Church creates additional revenue.


 

 
~~ A Presentation of Vows From The Heart Ministries LLC ~~
Rev. Christopher Tuttle, Pastor
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